What Your Favorite Food Says About Your Sex Life
There’s something about food and the act of eating it that’s readily associated with sex. The licking of fingers, the sucking of bones and the overall sensuality of food are sexually charged.
With all the associated metaphors, aphrodisiacs and rumors of aphrodisiacs, food and sex are intimately related areas of human life. We all have our favorite foods and our unique reasons for loving them. But what do these preferences say about us between the sheets? Read on as we explore the question and get to the bottom of the Favorite Food-Sex Complex.
Chicken and Waffles
“Keto be damned!” is your foodie battle cry as you slouch to your hallowed brunch joint at 11:30 am every Sunday morning. You will have your protein and you will eat it with carbohydrates, a big blob of full-fat butter, and a birdbath of syrup too, thank you.
As a person who likes to eat a balanced brunch, you’re also someone committed enough to the chicken n’ waffles dream to go out of your way to get a piece of it. People who live for this gut-busting combo believe that the banal must be transcended. You could crack open a bucket of Popeye’s and slap some Eggos in the toaster but no. You crave the real thing.
And you’re no different about sex. You’re not about to sully yourself with the mundane. You think it’s well worth biding your time to feel “that feeling” - a deep-down connection that delivers the toe-curling, out-of-body-experience sex is for you. You’re in it to win it, seeking that glove fit.
Modern Mexican
Rooted in the traditions of the pre-Columbian kitchen as deeply as the mighty taco or warming pozole, Modern Mexican is the actualization of the nation’s culinary traditions. Introducing new elements to the Mexican foundation of ultra-freshness and complex seasoning, Modern Mexican is making friends everywhere.
The Modern Mexican aficionado takes pride in following culinary trends. This is someone who, like our chicken and waffles friend, will crawl a mile to experience a restaurant known for intelligently prepared Modern Mexican cuisine.
Modern Mexican, a lover of food that has been played with, takes that love of surprises and innovation into the bedroom. You, spicy little foodie, are also a great connoisseur of all that turns your exquisitely sensitive crank. Just as exacting about sex quality you are about food quality, you’re not shy about bringing some kinky toys along for the ride.
Burger and Fries
Modernity’s answer to apple pie’s quaint Americana is the classic burger and fries. Those three little words mean so much to so many. People who favor the iconic burger and fries combo are admirers of the familiar and reliable.
The burger and fries devotee loves the simplicity of this favorite food. It’s undeniable that simplicity is married to availability and affordability, adding economically-viable convenience to the burger platter. When you’re hungry, you need your “go-to” fuel to feel fed and the sooner the better.
You, my fast food junky friend, are the salt of the sexual earth. You’ll do just about anything for your lover, up to and including stuff you’re a little scared of. You know you’re predictable, so you make up for that by being GGG (Good, Giving, and Game). You’re a lovable love hound, willing to step outside your comfort zone for the one you adore.
Dim Sum
Typically associated with the Cantonese kitchen, dim sum is a brunch buffet that comes to your table on rattly little trolleys, one after the other. On those trolleys are small plates, like dumplings, sticky rice, and chicken’s feet (which are finger-lickin’ good, by the way).
The experience of dim sum is half its pleasure, with rattling trolleys coming at you faster than you can eat. You select only what you wish to consume. No one judges. Everyone is there to eat their favorite items and is too busy chowing down to notice anything except whatever’s between their chopsticks.
Dim Sum, you are one special unicorn. Fearless and at home wherever you go, dim sum is your idea of a cheap, three-hour holiday. You were born to touch it, taste it, and know it in the biblical sense.
You do Modern Mexican one better in the sex department. You’re not too delicate to eat sweet and sour chicken feet, little claws turned hot pink in the sticky sauce. And you’re not too proud to say that kinky accouterments and saucy ideas get you crazy.
Ribs
Wherever you go, ribs are a bone of contention. People swear by certain methodologies when it comes to ribs. Dry rubbed or secretly sauced, beef or pork, Austin or Kansas City, fanatical ribs devotees have potent opinions about ribs. They’ll argue for countless hours about which ribs reign supreme and where to eat them. While eating ribs, the rib aficionado is unreachable, sucked deep into the bone-gnawing vortex.
And therein lies the dry-rub, friends. You, Ribs, are a lover so focused on what you’re doing that you sometimes lose track of your lover. Your single-minded concentration can be both a blessing and a curse. Come up for air and breathe once in a while, Ribs. Your partner will appreciate it.
Conclusion
Your favorite food is a window into your sex life and how you conduct it. So, the next time you sit down to eat that adored comestible, remember: you are what you eat. As in food, so in sex.