If You Worry about Meditating Perfectly, Try Shifting Your Perspective
By Emily Alexander
It was March 2020 when I made the conscious decision to try meditation. At the time, COVID-19 cases had begun to tick upward around the world, and, like millions of other people, I was stressed out. Long before the Coronavirus, I had heard about the benefits of meditation through numerous podcasts, Youtube videos, and articles. Time and time again, I heard incredible, successful people like Oprah Winfrey, Bill Gates and Paul McCartney describe how meditation changed their lives. So, last March, I decided to begin to create a daily practice. It seemed like meditation could help me through a challenging time. A year later, I am happy to report that it has been life changing.
When I began to meditate on a daily basis, I encountered many roadblocks. I was unconsciously creating these challenges with my own preconceived notions of what meditation was supposed to feel like. In my mind, I imagined that a successful meditation involved sitting blissfully in pure silence and having virtually no thoughts. While this may be the reality for some people, as a beginner I found that my expectation didn’t match my reality. The first week I tried meditating was challenging, in part because I was so focused on having the “perfect” session. As I sat for ten minutes on the floor in my apartment, I felt like everything I did wasn’t right. I pictured Oprah meditating and thought, “Why are there so many thoughts going through my head? I think I’m doing this wrong. I just thought about lunch for three minutes; that can’t be right.” And then, right when my thoughts were a little quieter, a car would start honking outside or my neighbor would start talking loudly. Exasperated, I’d think to myself, “I’m doing this all wrong; this isn’t supposed to be happening.”
For beginners, meditation might seem almost daunting. There is a common misconception that a successful meditation is meant to be free of all thoughts. However, it's natural for unwanted thoughts to come up. The key is to first notice these thoughts, and then let them go. This is easier said than done! But remember, all you have to do during meditation is refocus on the rhythm of your breathing if you get caught up in your thoughts. Another important point to remember, is everyone meditates differently. For some, meditation brings up thoughts that trigger a wide range of emotions, some of which may not have been fully processed yet. People can laugh or cry during meditation. For others, it may be beneficial to listen to a guided meditation on Youtube and lay on a yoga mat. While some people prefer to do a visualization meditation and ignite their imagination, others enjoy repeating affirmations. Despite the different types of meditation, the key is to find a technique that works for you. A meditation style that one person swears by might not be beneficial for you, and that’s okay! A year later I’m still working on letting go of unwanted thoughts during meditation, but every practice gets better. So enjoy the journey!