Should We Be Trusting Celebrities With Our Health?
So, here’s the deal. Celebrities make up an enormous chunk of our lives. They set forth cutting edge fashion trends via hairstyles, makeup looks…virtually everything. They tend to be at the forefront of much of what’s in and what’s not. It’s not too difficult to understand why—many posit celebrities as superhuman beings. While celebrities have often seemed to rest on a god-level tier by the masses, social media has allowed the trends and fads of these icons to be promoted at even greater levels. Health fads have become some of the most popularized trends to hit our timelines, but let’s be honest. Should we really be taking health advice from people who aren’t licensed professionals? Um…probably not. So, rest assured, I’m here to disprove all of the most popping celebrity trends out right now. Brace yourself, guys!
GWYNETH PALTROW, YOU WANT US TO PUT THAT WHERE?!
Gwyneth Paltrow has been a strong proponent of jade eggs—small crystal eggs that you insert like a tampon and leave it in all day or while you’re sleeping. Girl, No! Stop it! Do not ever put anything up your lady bits. Our girl is self-cleaning. The egg is said to boost orgasms, increase vaginal tone, hormonal balance, and feminine energy. But, here’s the thing ladies: your vagina is perfectly fine without these things. The world has this very ugly habit of making things pertaining to the vagina dirty—discharge, periods, even the actual word! But there is no need to douche or insert gels, creams, and crystals inside of you. It’s actually very unhealthy too, just FYI. Gynecologist Dr. Jen Gunter also went on to say jade is porous so leaving the egg in your vagina could cause things like Bacterial Vaginosis or Toxic Shock Syndrome (the illness all tampon users have been fearing for decades). Please, guys, let’s keep the crystals on our windowsills and not all up inside of us—and this is coming from a girl with a ton of crystals all in her room.
I said they’re in my room, not in me.
LOSE WEIGHT QUICK SCHEMES, YEAH RIGHT!
This diet has been made popular by celebs like Jennifer Aniston, Kate Hudson, and, you guessed, it Gwyneth Paltrow (I swear, I don’t have it out for her!). The claim? Avoid acidic food and your body’s pH will be balanced, and you’ll lose the weight. The truth? Nothing you eat will change your body’s pH balance! These places our little souls—if you have one—call homes honestly are already equipped to balance our pH levels, so we don’t need to. Now, as for the losing weight part, you’re probably going to lose weight if you’re eating healthier! You are not losing weight because the pH in your body is shifting, you’re losing weight because the alkaline diets calls for you to cut out meat, refined sugars, and processed foods. The diet also claims that you won’t have to exercise, so here’s a little pro tip: never trust a “lose weight quick” scheme that says you won’t need to exercise. In general, these diets aren’t that useful. If you want to make that type of change, you need to be implanting a full lifestyle overhaul—eating healthier (not just dieting), exercising, and being more conscientious of what you’re putting in your body. Oh! And guess what happened to the guy who invented the alkaline diet? He might be going to prison for practicing without a lesson! Do with that information what you will.
DETOX TEAS: HERE’S THE 411
Here’s a fun fact that you may not have known that I didn’t just tell you: anything that claims you can lose weight quickly without lifestyle changes is probably a scam. Teas that claim you can lose a ton of weight without putting the work are no different. They often contain laxatives and caffeine that can make you lose body weight (but that’s not the same as losing body fat). Also, the effects from these teas don’t last! Like with anything claiming to allow you to lose weight quickly, you can gain the weight quickly too. Not to mention there can be discomforting side effects like potassium depletion, electrolyte abnormalities, diarrhea, nausea, and bloating! Your body is magical—it maintains your pH and detoxifies itself naturally, so you don’t have to.
Let me end off by saying this, leading a healthier life in all facets is so much better than just dieting to lose weight. In a society that clearly favors and praises smaller women, it’s extremely easy to see weight loss as the finish line; it can become an obsession, even. With body and lifestyle changes, it’s essential to remember your beauty, worth, and importance to the world. So, if you’re really looking for a physical change, remember to skip the fads for an overall lifestyle change that promotes mental and emotional health just as much, if not more.