How To Get Over Your Summer Fling
Okay, so, aside from networking and much needed rest and relaxation, the summer is the primetime to get a seasonal boo. It’s quick, it’s passionate, but above all—it’s fleeting. Whether you found the love of your summer life at an internship, on a vacation, or in your hometown, one thing remains the same: summer flings are usually, well.... just for the summer. Of course, there are also those cases where Cupid shoots his arrow and a summer fling turns into a four-season love, but for many people, summer flings are just flings. They’re fun and exciting, sure, but for many people they have an expiration date, and adhering to or enforcing that date can be a bit awkward. But, thankfully, I am here to save the day and all of your relationships with this guidebook to ending things amicably with your summer boo—it’s OK, thank me later.
Tip 1: Communicate
Let me preface by saying, if you are head over heels for the guy you thought you would only like seasonally, by all means go for it! Just because something starts off in the summer doesn’t mean you guys are destined to fail. But, for the ladies that knew where this relationship was headed when it started, this tip is the best and most important to follow. We are all adults (kinda?). We are all grown people trying to act like we know what we’re doing what with our lives—newsflash: most of us don’t—but that is not an excuse to go plowing through someone’s emotions without a care in the world. All it takes is a simple conversation. Where are you guys headed? What do you guys want? Throwing in some additional (but honest and heartfelt) compliments to this conversation can also be really useful in softening the “Let’s Just Be Friends After This” blow.
Tip 2: Write
You don’t have to jot down sweet nothings, and declare your undying love with pen and paper, but writing does help. Speaking from personal experience, writing letters to a person I have no intention of sending the letter to is a huge stress reliever and makes it much easier to communicate my emotions with them when the time comes. Think of it as a practice round for Tip #1. You write down all of your feelings and emotions with no inhibitions. Say exactly how you feel. Cuss. Italicize. Capitalize. Get it all down on paper, so the conversation with Summer Bae goes as smoothly as possible. Breakups—even breakups that were never really official—can be super tough, so this method of writing down your initial thoughts, can make it go amazingly smooth.
Tip #3: Be honest with yourself
What do you really want with this person? Do you want to keep in contact while you two are states or countries away? Do you want work towards an actual relationship? Do you want to stay in contact but only see each other when you’re in “the mood”? Regardless, this is an in-depth and truthful conversation you need to have with yourself. You can’t have this conversation if you don’t know what you want (trust me I know). Let’s also try to keep the whole “lying to yourself” thing to a minimum. Again, trust me. I’ve learned the hard way. If you can’t have an honest conversation with yourself, how the hell are you going to have an honest conversation with your (possibly ex) boo. It just doesn’t make any sense!
Tip #4: End things gracefully
The fourth and final tip I have for you can possibly be the most difficult one: Breakups are tough! But, assuming your summer love didn’t do anything to seriously break your heart, there’s really no need to end things on horrible terms. Be amicable. Who knows, maybe years from now you’ll reunite and fall madly in love again in true Rom-Com fashion. Of course, maybe you won’t, but what can I say? I’m a sucker for a good love story. Regardless, take this “breakup” in stride, and end things on good terms. Your summer passion came. It saw. It conquered. And now you’re on to the next season of your life both literally and figuratively—enjoy it!